Sunday, October 12, 2008

Speech & Life

Disclaimer: I am NOT a poet, and I'm not pretending to be. I suck at poetry. That said, here's a poem I wrote. Sorry about the quality, lol.

trapped in a cocoon of angst and regrets
everything i reach for passes 'fore i can grasp it

i watch as my ideas become real
though it isn't i that drew them

life plays out behind my eyes
and clouds over what my true breath is like

where is my fix? is there a fix?
i hope without hope but yearn nontheless

i want to be me but fear holds me back
irrational fear that runs beside normalcy

A New Post...Finally

I really wish I posted to this blog more often. It really is meditative to write about how I feel and deal with, I just tend to put if off a lot.

Everything's been decently well lately, except I'm becoming increasingly unhappy for a number of reasons. It's probably due to the birth control I'm on, but who knows. I am happy to have decided to transfer schools and study meteorology instead of political science. Poli.Sci. is good and all, but I want to be able to better apply my knowledge to something scientific. I think this will be a change for the better.

As soon as fall break is over, I'm going to contact my school's speech and hearing center. I think it's time I find out if I can do something about my impediment or not. I've been putting if off because I want to pretend it doesn't exist, but it's very real. I'll put up a new post as soon as I find anything out. I think I'm actually more nervous that if there is a program I could be a part of the treatment wouldn't work, than actually going into the program to begin with.

I'm also very proud of myself for a big step I took lately. I'm starting a vegetarian student organization on campus, which means putting myself in front of people and working on my leadership skills. The first meeting went extremely well. Proof that even with a speech impediment, one can still be in charge.